The Quiet Gay Revolution

Okay, I just read the scariest article in Time Magazine. I'll paste it here...I'm really afraid for this country if this is how Americans feel.

Thursday, Jun. 14, 2007
The Quiet Gay Revolution
By Michael Kinsley

When William F. Buckley Jr. revived American conservatism by founding National Review in 1955, he said the magazine's job was to stand "athwart history, yelling stop." At that time, history did seem to be moving in the wrong direction if you were a conservative, and Buckley was gutsy to admit as much. Later, during the Reagan era and after, conservatives enjoyed thinking that history was on their side. They saw themselves as riding it like a bronco, yelling not stop but faster! faster!

That's not how they look now. On no issue is history moving faster than on "gay rights"--an already antiquated term for full and equal participation and acceptance of gay men and women in American life. The work is not finished, of course, but what took black Americans more than a century, gays have accomplished in two or three decades (thanks in no small part to blacks, who designed the template for this kind of social revolution). We still argue about it, but the whole spectrum of debate has moved left. A right-wing thug like Tom DeLay or Newt Gingrich probably has more advanced views about homosexuals than dainty liberals of the past century like Adlai Stevenson or Hubert Humphrey. And whatever the actual views, public expressions of overt homophobia are now unacceptable from any national politician.

The debate of 14 years ago about gays in the military seems almost quaint. Kids grow up today with gay friends, gay parents, gay parents of friends and gay friends of parents. If only blacks and whites were as thoroughly mixed together in society as gays and straights are. Kids are also exposed constantly to an entertainment culture in which gays are not merely accepted but in some ways dominant. You rarely see a reality show without a gay cast member, while Rosie O'Donnell is a coveted free agent and Ellen DeGeneres is America's sweetheart. The notion that gays must be segregated out of the military for the sake of our national security must strike Americans younger than, say, 40 as simply weird, just as we of the previous generation find the rules of racial segregation weird. (O.K., run that by me again: they needed separate drinking fountains because ... why?)

For 14 years the GOP has stood still as history has gone charging past. In last week's CNN-sponsored debate, every Republican presidential candidate said he supports "Don't ask, don't tell," the arch compromise of 1993. This ridiculous policy allows servicemen and -women to be gay in some existential sense but tosses them out if they talk about it or do anything about it. Most congressional Republicans voted for "Don't ask, don't tell," but the party platform for the 1996 presidential election retreated from it: "We oppose Bill Clinton's assault on the culture and traditions of the armed forces, especially his attempt to lift the ban on homosexuals in the military. We affirm that homosexuality is incompatible with military service." This last formulation, repeated in the GOP platforms of 2000 and 2004, is especially head in the sand. They can "affirm" anything they want, but homosexuality is obviously not incompatible with military service. There have always been gays in the military. The question is what conditions they serve under.

This used to be an issue that Republicans employed to torture Democrats. No longer. While Democrats hardly build their campaigns around it, in the CNN debates last week every Democrat was happy to go on record as favoring lifting the ban once and for all. By contrast, every Republican cowered behind "Don't ask, don't tell," patently wishing the whole thing would go away. Rudy Giuliani and Mitt Romney agreed that now "is not the time" to reopen the issue. Mike Huckabee blathered nonsensically about the "uniform code of military conduct." John McCain was almost campy, practically bursting into song about our "most wonderful military." Not one of them attempted to defend the ban on its merits. But not one would oppose it.

And yet not one, I suspect, has any doubt about where this issue is going. When opponents of gay rights talk ominously about a "gay agenda," they are not completely wrong. There has been an agenda in the sense of a long-term strategy, not unlike the carefully plotted strategy of Thurgood Marshall and others in the civil rights movement that ended formal racial segregation. It was a brilliant decision to start with the military rather than attempt to outlaw discrimination generally or push right away for gay marriage. Twenty years from now, maybe sooner, gays will have it all.

On bigger issues too, today's Republicans find themselves on the wrong side of history. On the advice of my fellow TIME columnist Bill Kristol, Republicans killed any health-care reform 13 years ago with the slogan "There is no crisis." No candidate of either party is saying that now. In fact, the crisis has gotten worse and will be harder to solve than it was in 1994.

Of course, you shouldn't change your principles just to be on the right side of history. Standing athwart history and yelling stop can be noble, and sometimes even works. But that's not what today's Republicans seem to be doing. They are chasing after history from a few yards behind.

Emails...

A few people wrote me back about my complaining email...I'll post them here- very interesting views....
From Granny:
Dear Sara,
I relate to your frustrations of dealing with a newborn. I took care of the babe and let the house go. I bought a few dozen diapers so I would not have to wash them every day. There were no disposables. I had no help from my husband. He was always out and about on the ranch. After I got over the pp period, I felt better and went into action. I had one good thing going in my favor. I had been brought up to get up early. My dad used to sprinkle our faces with water after the first call. I bless him for that now. At the time I hated him. Well, I found out for myself that the morning hours are the most valuable in getting things under control. I don't know what to tell people who cant get up early. If a person has help, it may be different.There just aren't enough afternoon hours to accomplish what should be done in the hours from five to noon. I had three children before we had electricity and running water. I just worked from daylight until dark doing what needed to be done. I never needed to worry about gaining weight. The household chores took care of that problem. Plus I always loved to get in some kind of exercise and I found time to read a good book. No television nor radio.I know the Lord will guide you and help you to accomplish the things you need to do. I am so grateful the baby has a loving mother and day to care for his every need. I think it a privilege to see a mother nursing her baby in sacrament meeting. Children need to see that also. It is a normal and natural thing to do.I loved the letter Jarem wrote to the bishop and the ward. It was very touching.When we were children, no one thought anything of seeing a mother nursing her child. Nothing is mentioned anymore when women expose everything on TV. Puzzling. Isn't iit?. Surely do love you and Jarem. Wish I could see and cuddle little Ari. Why do we all have to live so far apart? Perhaps I'll get to see you when Marcia and Kelly return from Guatemala. The Lord bless you and keep you in the hollow of his hand. Granny

From Wayne and Rebecca Madsen:
wow. Why is it that you keep facing so many obstacles for the way you
want to parent? And I can't tell you how completely baffled Rebecca and
I were at the reactions of your ward. Thankfully for your sake, your
bishop is guided by the spirit. There are plenty of bishops out there
who are more guided by the "influence of man" than by listening to the
spirit. Breastfeeding is completely natural, but beyond that it is vital
for a developing child's health. It sounds so ridiculous that you have
to sit in a corner like an outcast and cover up with a blanket (funny
enough, I thought of The Scarlet Letter :P ). This world never ceases to
amaze me with the crazy ideas some people have.

And good for you for being an exhibitionist! The world needs more of
them in the church. Modesty is very important, but modesty is terribly
different from understanding what we are and being comfortable with
that. I have gotten lots of flack from painting nudes.

Anyways, enough of that. I hope that you and Jarem and Ari are doing
better now. It's tough, but I'm glad you guys are sticking to your guns
and being parents the way you believe is correct.

From Rachel and John Hone:
I'm still planning on taking pictures of me doing spiritual things for your grandma...I just keep forgetting to take a camera home from work seeing as how we don't own one yet. John's working on that, we should have one soon. But I will try and remember to take a camera home so we can get them to you if it's not too late anyway. Sorry about all your trauma, that doesn't sound fun. I broke down yesterday because I felt like I wasn't being a good wife. I can only imagine doing your best to be a good mom and have other people tear you down because of it, horrible. I'm glad that Jarem is taking care of you both. so many men wouldn't blink about it.

Elizabeth:
Awesome, awesome. I love it! I think this is a great letter, Jarem.
Well-written and thought out. Thanks for sharing, Sara! Maybe some day
more people will be tolerant of something so natural and pure.

Love,
Me

Suzanne:
WE just wanted to say yay to u guys. That letter was
well put. I totally agree with you guys. Iam getting
so sick of the looks I get when breast feeding Halle.
I am a lot tougher dealing with it this second time
around though. Aaron and I thought that was a great
letter. Good luck and keep us posted. LOVE U.

Sacrament Meeting Talks

So, Dan and I have been asked to give talks this next Sunday on D&C 101:76-80. That's right, we both have to speak (15 minutes each) on five verses of scripture. Not cool! We've decided to split it up based on these two talks we found on lds.org:

Liz - God's Hand in the Founding of America - L. Tom Perry
Dan - The Divinely Inspired Constitution - Dallin H. Oaks

Granted, we haven't even read these talks yet (just found them 5 minutes ago), so this may change. But, this is what we've got to go on so far. Any thoughts, feelings, stories, facts, etc. would be greatly appreciated! (that means you especially, Mom and Dad). :) j/k!

Loves to you all!

Feliz Dia de los Padres!

Ha ha ha, I love it! :) Just a little cartoon to make you smile. Happy Father's Day to Dad, Dan, Jarem, Joseph, and Daniel (some day). I love you all and think you all make (or will make) great dads! Hope you've had a great day.

Love,
Elizabeth, Lizzie, Liz, Lizard, Lidabus

It's amazing how fast these kids grow. For those of you who haven't seen Ari latelly this may come as a bit of a shock! Here he is now

It feels like just yesterday that we took his first baby picture


I'm sure that in no time he'll be putting up signs like this and doing all kinds of great stuff

More new photos at jaremandsara.com

Thumb-sucking

Mom, you said Sara was your only thumb-sucker, but here are some pictures of me very fondly sucking away. :) I couldn't find any of Daniel or Joseph, though...they both had binkies in their mouths. Can you guys tell I'm having tons of fun with all these old pictures Dad gave us on those CDs? It's great!

Ari

Sara and Jarem!
That newest picture of Ari on your website (2.5 months) is SOOOOOOO cute! He has reddish hair and cute, blue eyes! Do you have blue eyes, Jarem? Oh, he's such a doll (Ari, I mean). :) I want to meet him so badly. Maybe I'll take a road trip by myself. :) j/k. Love you guys! (Where are those blessing pictures?)

I'm trying to cover all my bases, Josie! Now I'll write you an email and call your phone. :) One way or another, you will know that we have remembered you on this important day! It's hard to believe that you are 23 years old! Hope you have a great day with lots of smiles and laughter. We love you!

Love,
Elizabeth, Dan, Soren, and Anders

We WIN

(Rat Race reference- Mr. Bean...."I win") So guess what?!?! I just got on here, and it says that we are 84 degrees- hotter than ALL of you- including BAGDAD!!! MUH-HA-HA-HA. Okay, Todd and Louise just arrived- we're blessing Ari this weekend. Love you all....